Have I Got A Present For You
I cant believe what Christmas
Has come to today
All these atheists and judges
Trying to take it away
No carols in our public schools
No trees at City Hall
And they wish you ''Seasons Greetings''
At the Shopping Mall
Aint you sick of it all?
Chorus:
Well, theres a war on Christmas
Its under attack
But this year Americas taking it back
Separate Church and State
Thats what some lawyer said
I say its time we separated
Him from his head
You can call me ''Unchristian''
But thats not true
Cause have I got a present for you
(spoken:) Its the thought that counts.
Christmas is as American
As apple pie
Its the late December version
Of the Fourth of July
And they may go by separate names
But Uncle Sam and Santa Claus are one and the same
So boys, take aim.
Chorus 2:
Hell, theres a war on Christmas
Its under attack
But this year Americas taking it back
Separate Church and State
Thats what some liberal said
I say its time we liberated him from his head
You can call me ''Unchristian''
But thats not true
Buddy, I got a present for you
(spoken:) Hope its the right size.
O Say Can You See this Christmas
Baby Jesus, Tis of Thee
Im placing 50 shining stars atop
The Statue of ''Libertree''
Then Ill go and jingle the Liberty Bell
Hoist ' 'Old Glory'' with an elf
But if you say I cant deck my halls
Then Ill deck you myself.
Chorus 3:
Well, theres a war on Christmas
Its under attack
Hey, this year Old St. Nicholas is taking it back
Hes firing guns from his reindeer
Dropping bombs from his sled
This year, if you were naughty, youre as good as dead
Hes wearing red and white
But you can throw in blue
And has he got a present for you
And St. Tobys got one too
Yeah, we got a present for you
As in the A-C-L-U
(spoken:) Easy, Rudolph. Down boy.