fingertips

When I look back, tracing fingertips over plastic bags
當我回首過往指尖在塑料袋上隨意劃過
Thinking, 'I wish I could extrapolate some small intention
思索著'多希望自己可以推斷出某些細微的意圖
Or maybe get your attention for a minute or two'
或者引起你的注意哪怕只是一兩分鐘呢'

Will I die? Or will I get to that ten-year mark?
我會死去嗎或者還能再活十年呢
Where I beat the extinction of telomeres?
抵達那個階段後我會阻止端粒的消亡?
And if I do, will you be there with me, Father, Sister, Brother?
如果事實如此你們還能陪伴我的身旁嗎父親妹妹弟弟?

Charlie, stop smoking
查理戒菸吧
Caroline, will you be with me?
卡洛琳你會陪伴在我身旁嗎
Will the baby be alright?
寶寶會健康長大嗎
Will I have one of mine?
我會擁有我的孩子嗎
Can I handle it
就算真的有了
Even if I do?
我能勝任嗎
You said that I might
有人說我的心態
Its not fair or so they said
還不適合
To carry a child
去養育孩子
I guess Ill be fine
我想我可以做好的

It wasnt my idea the cocktail of things that twist neurons inside
雞尾酒之類的會扭曲腦內的神經元這並非我的想法
But without them, Id die
但離了這些我會死的
They say theres irony in the music, its a tragedy
他們說音樂含有諷刺意味便是悲劇
I see nothing Greek in it
我看不出其中的希臘意味
Give me a mausoleum in Rhode Island with Dad, Grandma, Grandpa and Dave
在羅德島為我修一處陵墓吧與爸爸爺爺奶奶戴夫安置在一起
Who hung himself real high
戴夫他葬身於高聳之處
In the National Park sky, its a shame and Im crying right now
在那落基山脈高空之處多麼可惜啊此刻我不禁痛哭
To get to you, save you if I take my life
為了接近你拯救你我會不惜犧牲自己
Find your astral body, put it into my eyes
尋找著你的星體再放入我的眼中
Give you two seconds tocry
給你兩秒鐘放聲痛哭
Take you home, I, Ill give you a blanket
帶你回家我會給你披上毯子
Your spirit can sit and watch TV by my side
你的魂靈可以坐下陪我一起看電視
Cause, baby, I ran through a time when I felt you were doing it
因為摯愛我彷佛真真切切經歷過這一段時光

I couldnt handle it, I was in Monaco
我無法趕到因為那時我在摩納哥
I couldnt hear what they said on the telephone
我聽不清他們在電話上所說的
I had to sing for the prince in two hours
在兩個小時後我就要為王子歌唱
Sat in the shower
獨自坐在浴室裡
Gave myself two seconds to cry
給自己兩秒鐘放聲痛哭
Its a shame that we die
多麼遺憾啊人皆有一死

When I was fifteen, naked, next-door neighbors did a drive-by
當我15歲時在泳池里赤身裸體隔壁的鄰居經過這裡
Pulled me up by my waist, long hair to the beach side
扶著我的腰肢與長發起身前往海灘邊
I wanted to go out like you, swim with the fishes
我想像你一樣出門與魚兒作伴暢遊
That he caught on Rhode Island beaches
在羅德島海邊將它們盡數俘獲
But, sometimes, its just not your time
但有時你沒遇到合適時機

卡洛琳是什麼樣的女人會說我最終還是要進那些機構的
Caroline, what kind of mother was she to say Id end up in institutions?
我想做的只有在湖邊親吻著Aaron Greene
All I wanted to do was kiss Aaron Greene and sit by the lake
在他們自製的飲料裡擰些酸橙汁水
Twisting lime into the drinks that they made
十六歲便生下了小孩在那個見證我出生和死亡的小鎮
Have a babe at sixteen, the town I was born in and died
Aaron ended up dead and not me

Aaron才是死去的那個而不是我
Aaron ended up dead and not me
What the ****s wrong in your head to send me away never to come back
你腦子到底有什麼毛病將我送走卻再也不回來
Exotic places and people to take the place of being your child?
在異國他鄉總有人又成為你的孩子
I give myself two seconds to cry
給自己兩秒鐘放聲痛哭
Let it crash over me like
讓悲傷肆意地侵襲我
The waves in the sea
就如同海浪般
Call me Aphrodite
稱呼我為阿芙羅狄蒂
As they bow down to me
在他們跪拜於我時

Sunbather, moon chaser, queen of empathy
日光浴狂熱迷追月者共鳴女王
I give myself two seconds to breathe
給自己兩秒鐘時間呼吸
And go back to being a serene queen
然後繼續去做安詳女王
I just needed two seconds to be me
我只需要兩秒鐘去做自己