dear mama

Woke up in a strip club tell me where the **** I'm at
在一个脱衣俱乐部 这就是我妈醒来的地方
How’d I get here and how am I gonna get back
我是如何来到这里的 我又将如何离开
Check my phone missed call from my mom
打开手机全是妈妈留给我的未接电话
If she knew where I was she'd have heart attack
如果她看到我这副样子是否会心碎
Mom I'm sorry I been knowing it’s hard to call me
对不起妈妈 我知道你此刻肯定很担心
I don't answer I get nervous I know i'm causing
我没有回复 因为我害怕了 我知道这是我一手造成的
Anxiety and stress you're baby bird's out the nest
焦虑和压力好像随时都要把我吃掉
But I keep my wings to my chest
但我依旧不能低头
There's distance between us
我爱你但我与你仿佛相隔甚远
I know that you'll see this
我知道你会看到这些话
I love you and kelsey
我爱你和Kelsey
I swear that I mean it
我对天发誓我爱你们
Just in my feelings
可现在我感觉越来越糟了
I'm sorry I need this
很抱歉我要用自己的方式麻痹自己
Throating this drink like I don’t know my weakness
烈酒刺激喉咙的一刹那我似乎无坚不摧
Most of my friends don’t know none of my secrets
我所谓的那些朋友其实对我一无所知
Only Le Play he knows some of my secrets
只有Le Play他懂我所想
I got these demons they wreck me to pieces
我豢养的魔鬼要把我撕成碎片
When I say I love you that's when I mean it
我爱你 我是认真的请你相信我
Today a pretty angel lost it’s wings to fly
我尝试逃离 却发现我早已失去了翅膀
I'm hurting while the smoke stings my crying eyes
我抽噎着 香烟漫进了我的眼睛 好痛
Lost inside a cloud oh I swear I tried
渐渐的我迷失了 但我发誓我真的尝试过挣扎了
Falling to the ground but I don't wanna die
仿如突然坠落在地狱间 救我 救我 我还不想离开
Mom I'm sorry I know you see the scars on my body
我很抱歉妈妈 我知道你看到了我身上的伤疤
But you will never stop me
可我清楚你永远不会阻止我的
Trying I’m trying I swear that I'm trying
我真的真的 真的好想努力活下去啊
But the rope around my neck seems to always keep tightening
可为什么 那种要窒息的感觉越来越强了
But it's hard when you know that you're ugly
从生到死 我都将 要挂着这张丑陋的嘴脸
And it's hard when you know that you'll fail
我永远都将是失败的 永远
And it's hard when there's nothing above me
我身后寸草不生 只有万丈深渊
A mouthful of secrets that I could never tell
我永远也不会说出埋葬在心底的千万条秘密
And I'm sorry that I never call you back and
我也很抱歉我从没有考虑过你的感受
And I'm sorry if I been quiet lately
如果最近一段时间我消沉萎靡
And I'm sorry if I been getting mad
又如果我突然疯癫不止 很抱歉我不是故意的
But if I'm only being honest hate the skin that you gave me
但实话来说 我讨厌你给我的这副躯壳
And I been trying to see the lights in the day
我曾发誓要在白天享受光芒万丈
But the lights go out and the sky turns grey
可每当我准备好 天空又立马灰暗了
And my heart's been numb but the words won't stay
无所谓了 都习惯了 我谁都不会去说 因为我还能拥抱自己
Just know that I love you and that will never fade ey
只要你知道我对你的爱 那我将永存于世
Today a pretty angel lost it's wings to fly
我失去了唯一的翅膀
I'm hurting while the smoke stings my crying eyes
点燃一根香烟 对自己说着没事
Lost inside a cloud oh I swear I tried
我已无力挣扎了
Falling to the ground but I don't wanna die
但我真的不想死 真的
Today a pretty angel lost it’s wings to fly
我再也回不到从前了
I'm hurting while the smoke stings my crying eyes
却告诉大家 我哭泣的原因是烟刺痛了眼睛
Lost inside a cloud oh I swear I tried
我真的累了
Falling to the ground but I don't wanna die
可我不想就这样离开了 我不想
You don't know that you got me
你不知道你对我来说有多重要
But I swear that you have me ok
我发誓我会一直爱你 好吗
You don't know that you got me
你知道吗 是你给了我活下去的力量
But I swear that you have me ok
我将伴你永远