Bridget The Midget

Well the wife went out of town bout a year or so back
And left me at home by myself to batch
And after five straight nights of
TV I was ready to scream
So I called up this beer drinkin buddy of mine
I said, 'Bill, I aint havin a real good time'
He said, 'Why dont we go to the rasslin matchesAnd let off a little steam?'
The main event was the
Spider from parts unknown
With his trusty partner, the
Blue Cyclone
They was takin on a team that never had been beat
Now Id never seen the matches before
And the crowd was backed up plumb out the door
But me an ol
Bill lucked out and got ringside seats
Well then they rang the bell and all
Hell broke loose
My legs was shakin like a rubber goose
Id never seen anything like this, not even in the war!
The Cyclone put the
Vulture in an airplane spin
Then he body slammed him and he did it again
I swear, I didnt see how that old boy could take much more
It was right about then in the thick of things
My buddy Bill threw a chair in the ring
And thats when
I knew wed better be headin for the door
Cause I saw the
Cyclone lookin at us
And he was rubbin his head and he started to cuss
And I knew if he caught us hed break
Bills neck for sure
Well, where we parked wasnt too far
And Bill ran so fast he beat me to the car
Locked the doors and wasnt about to let anybody in
And I turned around and the
Cyclone was there
And he said, 'Hey punk, you forgot your chair!'
And by the look in his eyes,
I knew that this was the end
Then he body slammed me two or three times
And he put his arms around me from behind
Then he pile drived me right there in the hard concrete
Broke both my arms and three of my ribs
Its the closest,
Ive ever come to being killed
And thats the last thing,
I remember fore he put me to sleep
Blue Cyclone
Blue Cyclone
Well, I woke up in a hospital bed just thinkin
I believe
I coulda took him if
I hadnt been drinkin
So the next time we meet,
I wont be on no binge
Cause I hadnt been the same since we had that fight
And I see that
Cyclone in my dreams at night
And Ill never be satisfied til
I get revenge
So I called up
Bill and told him my plan
And all he said was, 'Right on, man!Id do the same darn thing if itd been meIt all happened so quick when that car door slammedIt must a broke somethin, cause the door locks jammedYou was already down , hes gone time I got free'
Bill said, 'Since youre thinkin bout takin him againI know two ol boys that weigh 210Theyd take on a grizzly with a switch in the woods at night'
Well, we talked it over, they said theys willin
Theyd stop at nothing, short of a killin
Said, 'Hoss, well back you as long as you wanna fight'
So we all went down to the
Hammerlock
BarThe hangout of all the rasslin stars
And waited for the
Blue Cyclone to hit the door
Well, after a while, he finally appeared
And sat down at the bar and ordered a beer
And he barely took a sip fore
I stepped to the middle of the floor
I yelled, 'Hey Cyclone! Remember me?Im the guy you put to sleepOnly this time, you can see Im not alone, ha haYou see them two big dudes over there?'
The Cyclone looked and said, 'Over where?'
And I turned around,
Im a son of a gun, they was gone!
Well, the
Cyclone looked at me and grinned
He said, 'Okay punk, here we go againSeems to me that some guys never learn'
And then he waded through them tables and chairs
Put a full-nelson on me and grabbed my hair
And when he threw me to the floor,
I was startin to get concerned
The next thing
I remember, they was carryin me in
And the doctor said, 'Oh no, you again?'
I said, 'Doctor, how long you think itll be this time?'
He said, 'Boy, if you dont leave the Cyclone aloneOne of these days, you aint goin home!Youll need the undertakers services, not mine'
Blue Cyclone
Hes the meanest wrestler the ring has ever known
Hell make you groan, hell make you moan
Hell lay you prone and break your bones
Blue Cyclone
The Blue Cyclone