Stagger Lee

Stagger Lee
It was back in '32 when times were hard
He had a Colt .45 and a deck of cards
Stagger Lee
He wore rat-drawn shoes and an old stetson hat
Had a '28 Ford, had payments on that
Stagger Lee
His woman threw him out in the ice and snow
And told him, 'Never ever come back no more'
Stagger Lee
So he walked through the rain and he walked through the mud
Till he came to a place called The Bucket Of Blood
Stagger Lee
He said 'Mr Motherf****r, you know who I am'
The barkeeper said, 'No, and I don't give a good goddamn'
To Stagger Lee
He said, 'Well bartender, it's plain to see
I'm that bad motherf****r called Stagger Lee'
Mr. Stagger Lee
Barkeep said, 'Yeah, I've heard your name down the way
And I kick motherf*****g asses like you every day'
Mr Stagger Lee
Well those were the last words that the barkeep said
'Cause Stag put four holes in his motherf*****g head
Just then in came a broad called Nellie Brown
Was known to make more money than any ***** in town
She struts across the bar, hitching up her skirt
Over to Stagger Lee, she starts to flirt
With Stagger Lee
She saw the barkeep, said, 'O God, he can't be dead!'
Stag said, 'Well, just count the holes in the motherf****r's head'
She said, 'You ain't look like you scored in quite a time.
Why not come to my pad? It won't cost you a dime'
Mr. Stagger Lee
'But there's something I have to say before you begin
You'll have to be gone before my man Billy Dilly comes in,
Mr. Stagger Lee'
'I'll stay here till Billy comes in, till time comes to pass
And furthermore I'll **** Billy in his motherf*****g ass'
Said Stagger Lee
'I'm a bad motherf**** r, don't you know
And I'll crawl over fifty good p***ies just to get one fat boy's asshole'
Said Stagger Lee
Just then Billy Dilly rolls in and he says, 'You must be
That bad motherf****r called Stagger Lee'
Stagger Lee
'Yeah, I'm Stagger Lee and you better get down on your knees
And suck my * ***, because If you don't you're gonna be dead'
Said Stagger Lee
Billy dropped down and slobbered on his head
And Stag filled him full of lead
Oh yeah.