I Used To Hate My Body But Now I Just Hate You

I met you in November for a weekend
你我于冬月的假日相遇
I loved you by December like a fool
腊月刚至 我便失己地爱上了你
you left me for a friend over the summer
为友谊 你同我殇离于盛夏
I never had a chance to play it cool
没得选 我无法忍痛淡然

你推的那些书 我全都读过
I read all of the books you recommended
我一直在支持你朋友的乐队
I listen to your friend’s band all the time
你让我渴极的心得以满足
you justify and satiate my hunger
但丝毫无波澜
for not feeling alright
错解了许多言语

以为那是难求的答复
I misread every warning as an answer
你我与生死抗争 几度失心欲亡
to questions I was too afraid to know
你出然地吻了我 却就此永别
we touched upon a suicide like tourists
孤沉时 烟入我心 就此唤起睡意 淋着冷水冲洗身体 终沦陷
you kiss me for an elevator audience, pack your things and go
在那旅馆有个了结吧

我曾对自己厌极 但你更让我愁闷
when I’m lonely I smoke until I know how to sleep so find me the bath is running cold but it’s deep
你那次联系我 我就要上台且发烧难抑
finish what we started in a hotel with a view
你说你无法忘记我
I used to hate my body but now I just hate you
我就此泄气一通 失控而发狂

这虚晃的把戏我算是摸透了 但我曾是如此热忱
you call me while I’m backstage with a fever
听说你回家去了
you tell me how I’m always on your mind
但这并不如我意
I crush a paper bag to the receiver
你在我眼中 仍是满怀激情的
I learned that trick from a cartoon kid it's always something I wanted to try

I heard you live at home now with your parents
it doesn’t satisfy me like it should
I still see you as some kind of reassurance that someday I’ll be understood