I Used To Hate My Body But Now I Just Hate You

I met you in November for a weekend
你我於冬月的假日相遇
I loved you by December like a fool
臘月剛至我便失己地愛上了你
you left me for a friend over the summer
為友誼你同我殤離於盛夏
I never had a chance to play it cool
沒得選我無法忍痛淡然

你推的那些書我全都讀過
I read all of the books you recommended
我一直在支持你朋友的樂隊
I listen to your friend's band all the time
你讓我渴極的心得以滿足
you justify and satiate my hunger
但絲毫無波瀾
for not feeling alright
錯解了許多言語

以為那是難求的答复
I misread every warning as an answer
你我與生死抗爭幾度失心欲亡
to questions I was too afraid to know
你出然地吻了我卻就此永別
we touched upon a suicide like tourists
孤沉時煙入我心就此喚起睡意淋著冷水沖洗身體終淪陷
you kiss me for an elevator audience, pack your things and go
在那旅館有個了結吧

我曾對自己厭極但你更讓我愁悶
when I'm lonely I smoke until I know how to sleep so find me the bath is running cold but it's deep
你那次聯繫我我就要上台且發燒難抑
finish what we started in a hotel with a view
你說你無法忘記我
I used to hate my body but now I just hate you
我就此洩氣一通失控而發狂

這虛晃的把戲我算是摸透了但我曾是如此熱忱
you call me while I'm backstage with a fever
聽說你回家去了
you tell me how I'm always on your mind
但這並不如我意
I crush a paper bag to the receiver
你在我眼中仍是滿懷激情的
I learned that trick from a cartoon kid its always something I wanted to try

I heard you live at home now with your parents
it doesn't satisfy me like it should
I still see you as some kind of reassurance that someday I'll be understood