Something Bad Is HappeningMore Racquetball
CHARLOTTE: People might think I'm very dykish.
I make a big stink when I must, but goddamn!
I'm just professional, never too nonchalant.
If I'm a bitch, well, I am what I am!
Just call me 'Doc', don't call me 'lady'.
I don't like to talk when I'm losing the game.
Bachelors arrive sick and frightened.
They leave weeks later unenlightened.
We see a trend, but the trend has no name.
Something bad is happening.
Something very bad is happening.
Something stinks, something immoral.
Something so bad that words have lost their meaning!
Rumors fly and tales abound, stories echo underground!
Something bad is spreading, spreading, spreading round!
CORDELIA: Tell me how it tastes! Tell me if it's good!
Tell me, dear, if you'd like seconds-
CHARLOTTE: Stop!
CORDELIA: Go ahead and wound my pride.
CHARLOTTE: Just stop.
CORDELIA: You're feeling very sick inside. Well, okay.
So you've had a bad day.
I don't know what to say
Look what's become of my doctor.
She's my doctor,
And I love her!
She's got passion!
She's intelligent and, Jesus Christ, a doctor!
Very wealthy,
And I love her!
Doctor of internal medicine!
I'm heartsick, you're unhappy
CHARLOTTE: Life is crappy
CORDELIA: And you always see the glass half full. I'm nervous
CHARLOTTE: This is ****ing ridiculous!
CORDELIA: She's my doctor and I love her! She's got...
Heart! (CHARLOTTE: My spirits sag when I read the magazines)
CHARLOTTE: Men dressed in drag, next to their moms.
Fashion and passion and filler,
But not a word about the killer.
I like the ballgowns, but Jesus Christ!
CHARLOTTE AND CORDELIA: Something bad is happening!
CHARLOTTE: Something very bad is happening!
Something stinks, something immoral! (CORDELIA: Which she'd never say)
Something so bad that words have lost their meaning! (Little things don't get in her way)
Rumors fly and tales abound, (What can it be)
Stories echo underground! (What can it be)
Something bad is-
CHARLOTTE & CORDELIA: Spreading, spreading, spreading round!
CHARLOTTE: Look, a virus has been found!
Stories echo underground! Something bad is-
CHARLOTTE AND CORDELIA: Spreading, spreading, spreading round!
WHIZZER: It bounced in.
MARVIN: No, it didn't.
WHIZZER: Hit the line, you know it did.
MARVIN: Just begin.
WHIZZER: You kidding?
Who's telling who how to play?
MARVIN: Let me live, please forgive me for winning one game.
WHIZZER: Serve it up.
MARVIN: I attack!
WHIZZER: Hold it down, keep him back-
Something's gone out of whack!
MARVIN: I hit!
WHIZZER: Ah sh*t!
MARVIN: My game!
1 2 3 4!
WHIZZER: 1 2 3... Damn it.
MARVIN: 1 2 3 4.
WHIZZER: 1 2... Good serve, Marvin.
MARVIN: 1 2 3 4.
WHIZZER: 1 2... Hit my heel.
MARVIN: Don't be bitter.
WHIZZER: No big deal, the game is yours.
MARVIN: It's unreal, you're a quitter!
WHIZZER: I can't go on anymore!
MARVIN: Be a jerk, my sweet bruiser.
Try to be a decent loser! At least you could give me that!
WHIZZER: Excuse me, I'm ready to go! I'm ready... (He's kinda passing out, Marvin notices)
I'm sorry.
MARVIN: Do you know all I want is you?
Anything you do is alright.
Yes, it's alright. (CHARLOTTE AND CORDELIA: Everything will be alright.)
Yes, it's alright. (Everything will be alright.)
CHARLOTTE: Everything will be alright.