I See Everything
I See Everything -La Dispute
我洞悉了一切- La Dispute
Like any morning of my
像往常任何一個清晨一樣
Junior year
二年級的時光
I stumble in the classroom
我在教室中跌跌撞撞前行
Late but this day I see
已經很晚了，但今日我看到
Faces I feel
臉頰我能夠感知
An air like a funeral
墳場般死機的氣氛
Like a wake
像大夢初醒
As I sit down
當我恍然坐下
Teacher speaking
老師仍在喋喋不休著
Somewhat sombrely
些許陰鬱地
But still confident and calm
但仍舊自信且鎮定地
Part eulogy
部分是悼詞
Her speech and
她的演說
Part poem part celebration song
部分是詩、部分是慶祝的頌歌
Her warmth and smile
她的溫暖和燦爛笑容
She passes photocopies
她將一些複印件
Out to us of entries
向下分發
From a journal
來自一本日記
Kept so long ago
記述著許久之前的往事
She starts to read
她開始閱讀
And suddenly
突然
Its 1980
時間拉回到1980年
March 5
3月5日
The cancer is furious
癌症不可收拾地蔓延著
But our son is resilient
但我們的兒子身子堅挺
We have all the faith
我們有著充足的信念
Well get through this
我們必將熬過這一劫
No matter what the end
無論怎樣（結束）
Treatments are violent but
治療過程很粗暴
He keeps on smiling
但他一直這樣微笑著
Its amazing
多麼神奇
Finding joy in the little things
總能從瑣事中汲取快樂
April 12
4月12日
Andrews appetites improved
安德魯的食慾漸長
And we thank God everyday
我們每天都在感謝上蒼
But still its hard sometimes
但有時候還是很難以承受
To see him in that scarecrow frame
看到他在那稻草人般的骨架之中
July 9
7月9日
Theres a suffering
一絲痛苦
When I look in his eyes
當我直視他的雙眼
Hes been through so much
他經歷了太多
Weve all been through so much but
我們都經歷了太多但
What incredibleresolve
多麼無與倫比的堅毅——
Our little boy shows only 7
我們的小男孩展現出，在他只有七歲的時候
Standing face to face with death
與死神四目相對時
He said its easy to find people
他說很容易找到
Who have suffered worse than him
很多比他受苦更多的人
'Like Jesus suffered worse than anyone'
”就像耶穌受的苦比任何人都多一樣，“
He told me last night
他昨夜對我說
'When God abandoned him'and
“在上帝拋棄他時。”
September 20
9月20日
Weve been playing in the yard
我們在小院中玩耍
Lately his spirits are high
近來他精神頭很不錯
Although his blood counts arent
但他的血常規結果就截然不同了
October 14
10月14日
He feels tired all the time
他無時無刻不感到疲倦
November 30
11月30日
At the hospital again
再次出現在醫院
It feels like home when were here
但它就像家一樣，只要我們陪伴在他身邊
December 8
12月8日
Hes getting worse
情況越來越糟
January 19
1月19日
We buried our son today
我們埋葬了我們的兒子
Our youngest child
我們的幼子
And while his death was ugly
即使他的死亡過程十分可怖
We must not
我們決不能
Let it scare us from God
讓它將我們從主的身邊驅散
Abundant grace has restored him
充盈的聖光環繞中
A brand new body
他重獲嶄新的身軀
And set him free from the torture
將他從痛苦中免除
Finally rid of the cancer
終於擺脫了癌症的困擾
Before the moment he left
當他離去的一剎那
He briefly wrested from death
他短暫地從死神處掙脫
Suddenly opened his eyes
猛然睜開雙眼
Said ' I see everything'
說道：”我洞悉了一切。 “
'I see everything'
”我洞悉了一切。 “
And I will never forget it
我永遠也不會忘記
The peace and the comfort
你在痛苦中所展現的
You displayed through a pain
那份平靜與慰藉
That I can only imagine
一份只存在於我想像中的痛苦
The loss of a child
從幼子的痛失
To the torture of cancer
到癌症的困擾
Help me
救救我吶
Cause I can only imagine
因為我只能想像
How you recovered
你如何痊癒
Kept your faith
保持的你的信念
And held the brightness of life
將世間的光明
Inside the smile of a child
存儲在一個孩童的笑容之中
You had to bury
你必須埋葬
And I will never forget him
而我永遠不會忘記他
Or your steadfast faith
和你的堅定不移的信念
No I will never forget you
不我永遠不會忘記
Now six or seven years later
六七年一晃而過
Im devoid of all faith
我失去了一切信念
I am empty of comfort
失去了一切慰藉
And I am weary of waiting
我對等待感到疲倦
Though Ive felt nowhere what you have
儘管我沒感受到哪怕一點你當時的感受
I see nothing at all
我一無所知
Though Ive felt nowhere what he did
儘管我沒經歷哪怕一點他的經歷
My eyes are closed
我的雙目緊鎖