The Most Fashionable Faction (feat. Harry Callaghan)

(song by the STUPENDIUM)
（詞曲和演唱：stup大叔）
(three)
（三）
(two)
（二）
(one)
（一）
(BEGIN!)
（開始！）
scout:
偵察兵：
watch out!
當心！
the scout's out and about
這位偵察兵已經出門查看
running around
四處跑動
bringing bonks right down on your scalp
為你的頭皮帶來一聲巨響
do you even know
你到底知不知道
who you're talking to here?
你在和誰說話？
i'm a streak of greased lighting
咱可是條飛奔的滑頭閃電
keep fighting for years
隨軍征戰了多年
i'm a stunner
咱是個賊棒的擊昏專家
number one run and gunner
還是個賽跑冠軍和拿槍好手
my beats bring the heat
咱的擊打節奏帶來熱度
'cause i' m a sweet double jumper
只因咱是個套著針織暖心的二段躍者
your finger's on the trigger
你的手指雖已放上扳機
but before you get to pull it
但在你扣下之前
i'll take a sip of fizz
咱會灌一口菲茲牌原子能飲料
and i'll go whizzing past yor bullets
然後咱就從你的子彈旁呼嘯而過
i am on it like a rocket
咱的速度快得如同小火箭
on a course to freakin pound ya
直衝並敲你丫的一下
call me super sonic
叫咱超級索尼克
'cause i'm running rings around ya
因為咱在你的周圍跑出了金圈
i am a dab hand with a 'sandman'
咱揮舞睡魔叼得一批
i'm the baddest in the badlands
也是控制點badlands中的絕讚惡棍
i'm a speed freak on a killstreak
咱還是個對擊殺連擊上癮的速度怪胎
see a blur then it's
眼前掠過一片模糊接著就
bang
砰
bang!
砰！
DemoMan:
爆破手
I'm the Demo
俺就是個惡魔
Boom goes my M.O.
爆炸就是俺的專利
Tyrant from the Highlands
來自高地的暴君
Getting violent on the Bellows
用風箱般的咆哮證明他的暴躁
The only thing more volatile than Me
比俺還喜怒無常的
Would be my Ammo
只有俺的軍火們
I'll leave you blown to Pieces
俺會把你吹成尖叫的碎片
While my piece is Screaming
只要俺的榴彈槍也開始尖叫
BLAMMO!
噗嚷嘭！
Did this have whisky In?
這玩意裡面是威士忌？
Or was it Nitroglycerine?
還是硝化甘油？
I'll find out on the way Out
俺會知道那是啥的
If I'm spouting flaming p*ss Again
只要看俺在噓噓時有沒有噴出火焰
'Cause if I live another Day
因為就算俺多活多一天
My liver might go Anyway
俺的褐肝恐怕也撐不下去
And I'd rather go in Glory
而俺寧可光榮離去
So in war I won't be giving In
所以俺才不在戰爭字典中寫下投降
I suffer for my Art
俺在俺的藝術中受難
I've got sulphur on the Heart
俺甚至成為了“硫心”
This Tartan Spartan's
這個格子呢的斯巴達人
Gonna tear you Apart
就要把你四分五裂
Fire shots at the Cyclops
向著獨眼巨人開火的
It never ends Well
下場都不是特別好
Oh,they're gonna have to glue you,
喔，小鬼們會把你粘好，
back together in Hell!
拼回原樣再扔進地獄的！
snIper:
狙擊手：
ZOOM
瞄準
RED dot
紅點
BOOM
射擊
HEADSHOT
爆頭
your HEAD'S got a new
你的頭上通出了一個新的
lead CLOT
鉛彈之路
bring you to a DEAD stop
把你引至死路一條
leave you with your HEAD poped
再把首級炸開的你扔在原地
another TARGET on my list
吾之清單上又有一個目標
that can be CHECKED off
能被劃掉了
'cause on a MISSION
因為在任務中
i am viciously EFFICIENT
吾有著極高效率
my vital's just my RIFLE
吾致命的要害只有吾之來复槍
and a set of JARS to p*ss in
和吾囤積的尿瓶
when it comes to ASSASSINS
刺客降臨之際
you could say i'm HIGH -CALIBRE
你可以說吾與槍化為一體
YANKING my machete
猛地抽回吾之砍刀
from your HEAD like it's excalibur
就像從你頭上拔出亞瑟王的魔劍
NO mercy mercenary
不留一絲仁慈的澳洲僱傭兵
i'll take you DOWN like cattle when
吾會像放倒牲口般把無用的你拿下
my true FORTE'S in 2fort
吾之特長是在2fort的情報戰中
playing BLOOD sports on the batterments
用血腥為體育競技增值不少
spray your BRAIN
將你的腦漿濺射在牆上
'fore you even know WHAT'Shappening
你甚至來不及知曉何事發生了
SAFE to say
吾敢說
no way that you'll be wearing HATS again
你沒有再戴上帽子的可能性了

If you're seeing RED or you're feeling BLU
如果你殺紅了眼或感到憂藍
If you wanna bust caps
如果你想要開火
And wear them too
同時也想通過帽子而火起來
If you like warfare
如果你熱愛競爭
In stylish head wear
特別是頭飾方面
Well,have we got the game for you
好吧，這有著最合你口味的遊戲
No there isn't any greater
不，不會有再好的
MILITARY MILLINERY SIMULATOR
軍事帽子模擬器
We fight all day to find out who's
我們整日戰鬥只為
The most fashionable faction in TF2
找出TF2中最時髦的派系
SOLDIER:
火箭兵
LISTEN up
趕緊給爺TMD豎起耳朵
'CAUSE I won't say it again
爺才不會說多一遍
YOU'D better not be sissies
你最好別當個慫包
BECAUSE war is not a game
因為戰爭才不是啥子遊戲
UNLESS of course it's war games
除非它真TND是個遊戲
THEN I'm all for games
那爺可絕對支持
HOPE you're keeping score
希望你個小癟三能給爺加分
BECAUSE numerate I sure ain't
因為爺在計數就是個渣渣
I'M good at fighting
爺的掐架技術一流
ASK sun tzu
滾去問孫子
I taught him all he knows
爺給了他畢生所學
IN the art of shovel fu
還給了他一套《孫子鏟法》
WAY back in ancient China
真TM懷念那個中國的武士之夜
WHEN I met him on night
當他撞見他時
HE said soldier's really cool
他說爺真是帥到掉渣
AND the best at winning fights
也是個勝利的好手
NOW I win all the fight money
現在爺捲走全部的賭金
WHEREVER I go
無論爺在何方
'CAUSE my rockets go boom
只要爺的意大利炮再TMD炸一下
AND then you explode
你個渣渣就滾去原地爆炸吧
NOW,the army told me that I was crazy
現在，上頭那群混球跟爺講爺瘋了
BUT I wrote this song
但爺的說詞TMD是自己寫的
SO I'm clearly amazing
所以爺絕逼是個帥爆你M的傢伙
Spy:
間諜
Gentleman
紳士們
It Won't Be Gentle
在下絕非紳士
When I Sneak Into Your Base
當在下潛入閣下的雅舍
And Steal The Faces Of Your Helpless Friends
並笑納閣下的無助好友之臉
Stealing Your Briefcase
順走閣下的公文包
Really Was A Brief Case
那還真是個公用的提包
You Think You're Smart
閣下自認聰明絕頂？
But I Have The Intelligence
但在下已把奪旗的情報裝進智慧口袋
Be A Man
閣下請務必硬漢一點
Why Do You Have To Die Screaming
為何要失態地尖叫離去呢
I Shoot You
把閣下爆頭
Take The Loot
奪得贓物
And Take My Suit For Dry Cleaning
在下再順帶把西服送去乾洗
I'm Not Cheating
在下才沒有作弊
You Ignorant Swine
閣下真是個無知的下流豬腦！
I Creep In And Sneak Things
在下會躡手躡腳地偷——
Right Into Your Spine
偷往閣下的脊柱送上刺擊
When I Fight With My Butterfly
當在下按拳王的教誨滑動蝶刃時
It Stings Like A Bee
它便化身蜂刺
So Tonight Tell Your Mother 'Hi'
因此請向令堂問聲好
Give Her A Kiss From ME
並替在下送上一吻
I'm Debonair With Deadly Flaur
在下溫爾文雅，一擊致命，吹毛求疵
I'm Anyone And Anywhere
在下一人千面，無孔不入
The Face Your Mother Wakes to
令堂親愛的枕邊人
Is The Last You'll Ever See
將化身閣下的送葬者
HEAVY :
機槍手
I AM HEAVY WEAPONS GUY
老子是個大傢伙
I MAKE PUNY BABIES CRY
總是弄哭小傢伙
WANT TO LIVE?
想活著？
RULE ONE:
第一條：
DON'T
別
TOUCH
動
MY
這
GUN!
槍！
MAY BE SLOW
老子也許慢了點
NO NEED TO RUSH YA
沒必要著急
WHEN I'M ROLLING WITH NATASCHA
當老子轉動娜塔莎機槍時
FILL YOU DEAD WITH HOLES
會把你的彈孔填滿死亡
WE CRUSH YA
同志們會擠壓你
LEAVE YOU COLD
你的屍體會被
LIKE SNOW IN RUSSIA
像俄國寒風般冷冰冰地留下
PUNY GUN
迷你槍？
I PUNCH MORE DAMAGE
老子用拳頭說話！
CHEW YOU UP FOR LUNCH LIKE SANDVICH
像三明治般把你吃乾抹淨
THINK YOU CAN OUTRUN ME?
覺得你能逃脫老子的掌心？
PROVE IT
證明啊
I'D LIKE TO SEE YOU
老子倒想看你
OUTRUN
跑過
BULLET
子彈

If you're seeing RED or you're feeling BLU
如果你把雙眼瞪紅或想唱起藍調
If you wanna bust caps
如果你想讓槍管“帽”火
And wear them too
並戴起帽“火”
If you like warfare
如果你喜歡
In stylish head wear
時“帽”的戰爭
Well,have we got the game for you
成，我們向你安利這款遊戲
No there isn't any greater
不可能還會有更棒的
MILITARY MILLINERY SIMULATOR
軍事帽子模擬器
We fight all day to find out who's
我們用槍爭吵了一天為了
The most fashionable faction in TF2
奪得TF2中最時髦派系的稱謂
ENGINEEr:
工程師：
HOWDY,THE ENGINEER'S IN THE FIELD(Ya !)
你好呀，工程師正在田中馳騁（呀！）
FARM BOY CHARM
這個農場男孩
WITH A MEGATON YIELD(Hu!)
用百萬噸的產量誘惑你（呼！）
I'VE GOT A CRANIUM
老夫在顱骨上
LACED WITH URANIUM
鑲上了鈾元素
DISPENSE YOUR OFFENSE
抵禦你的攻勢
WITH THE WEAPONS I WIELD(Yee--HA!!)
只需要揮舞老夫的武器就成（咿——哈！）
I'M HOT STUFF
老夫可火辣了
'CAUSE I'VE A HUNDRED DEGREES
因為老夫就是個人形自走“百度”
SO IF YOU BOIL MY BLOOD
所以如果你激起了老夫的熱血
YOU'LL GET BURNED ON STEAM
你就等著被steam架空吧
I'M OVERQUALIFIED
老夫的資歷游刃有餘
TO LEAVE YOU NULLIFIED
這會使一無是處的某人被廢棄
AND TAN YOUR SORRY HIDE
順帶炸掉你可憐的庇護所
YOU'D BEETER RUN AND HIDE
你最好屁滾尿流地蜷縮起來
OR DIE BY MY MACHINES
老夫也不介意多記個人頭
JUST A FRIENDLY ENGY
畢竟老夫也不是什麼惡魔
PREVENTING ENTRY WITH A DEADLY SENTRY
不過是帶著死亡在入口放哨罷了
EACH PRACTICAL PROBLEM I SOLVE
每當老夫攻克一個技術奇點
MY SKILL MOUNTS
老夫就多了個實踐技巧
THE ONLY YHING HIGHER THAN MY IQ
老夫承認智商還是比不上
IS MY KILL COUNT
老夫的人頭數啊
pYRo:
噴火兵：
FIRE!
火光！
FIRE!!
火勢！ ！
FIRE!!!
火情！ ！ ！
FIRE!!!!
火焰！ ！ ！ ！
Emboldened scoiding folds
用鼓勵和斥責滴
Of red and gold Are my desire
金紅烈焰擁抱你似偶滴渴求啊
It's my sacred duty
這似神賜予偶滴無上使命
Keep the beauty burning higher
讓華麗滴燃燒更猛烈些唄
Leave yoU dismembered iN the embers
讓分崩離析滴你躺倒在灰燼中
Every felling smells The pyre
每股痛楚都似柴薪滴新助燃
I'm a terror From the nether
偶似冥界中滴驚駭之物
Something that you've never seen
不可名狀到你未曾聞名
with a charcoal Soul
以木炭為魂
Heart pumping kerosene
以煤油為血
You've met Your match
你更新後遇上滴對手
You'll be a charred patch
會把你撕成焚盡滴補丁
On the floorboards
扔在地板上
I'll strike a match
偶會劃一根火柴
And Strike the match
然後劃掉比賽
Off of the scoreboard
上面的計分板
What's it Matter If my brains
有什麼所謂呢，偶滴大腦
Deranged when I snuff You out
變得錯亂與偶把你劃掉沒啥關係唄
Boy!does it Look lovely out!
火汁們！不jo得外面很可耐咩！
Candy canes And Fluffy Clouds
四處都似糖果杖和毛茸茸滴雲
Now I'm racking up the kills
現在偶會刷起人頭數
AS I'm cranking up the Grill
順帶架起燒烤架
Easy to Blow You away
把你吹飛再容易不過了
When you're just powder
畢竟你只剩火藥般的粉末了
mediC:
醫生：
got a little headache?
覺得有些頭痛？
you'd better call the medic
最好撥打急救
were you wanting anesthetic?
你想要些麻藥？
really don't be so pathetic
真的別當個慫貨嘛
that burning is a bird within your sternum
你胸腔中的灼痛感由一隻小鳥引起
that snuck in while i was working
鄙人上次手術時它飛了進去
but i think a bloody dove
但鄙人覺得血腥的鴿子
is quite a lovely aesthetic
實在是種惹人愛的美學
you grazed your knee?
你擦破了膝蓋？
well,it seems to me
好吧，對鄙人來說
you need invasive
你急需擴散式的
exploratory surgery
大規模開創性手術
see ,i may have a little uncertainty
看，鄙人似乎有些不確定
between patient?
病人？
specimen?
標本？
blur to me
對鄙人來說差不多
get the point of my syringes in your hiney?
發現鄙人的注射器對準了你的後庭？
i'll ubercharge and
鄙人會為你充能
buff you till you're shiny
把你增強至發光
i could fix you quick with my medi gun
鄙人是能迅速用醫療槍治好你
the procedure's painless
那會是無痛的手術
but that's no fun
但那就不好玩了

If you 're feeling BLU or seeing RED
如果你容易感到悲傷或變得狂暴
If what's on your mind's
如果獨占你的思維的
What's on your head
只有頭上的東西
Who wants to battle
誰還想戰鬥呢
When there's catalogues
只要有一連串寫滿目錄
Of hats to browse instead?
的帽子能被購置？
It's not how far you push the cart
推車模式中你推了多遠才不重要
What matters is the noble art
這種高貴的
Of dressing heads in dandy threads
花花公子般打扮頭部的藝術
To wear whilst you are blown apart
在你被炸裂時極其重要
If you're seeing RED or you're feeling BLU
如果你殺紅了眼或感到憂藍
If you wanna bust caps
如果你想讓槍管“帽”火
And wear them too
並戴起帽“火”
If you like warfare
如果你喜歡
In stylish head wear
時“帽”的戰爭
Well,have we got the game for you
好吧，這有著最合你口味的遊戲
No there isn't any greater
不，不會有再好的
MILITARY MILLINERY SIMULATOR
軍事帽子模擬器
We fight all day to find out who's
我們整日戰鬥只為
The most fashionable faction in TF2
找出TF2中最時髦的派系
(Nobody has so many hats.)
（沒有人會有這麼多帽子）
(It's ridiculous.)
（那太扯了)